Monday, May 18, 2009
the softer side
This is my entry for week 3 of the Self Portrait Challenge theme diptych. I tried to go softer with this one, including white in both photos and a slight aging effect on the processing. This wasn't too terribly creative, but considering I was fighting off a migraine all day long today and never even took time for Bench Monday, this is as good as it was bound to get.
I also wanted to contribute this to Shutter Sisters' Invisible Photographer challenge today. I remember less than a year ago, before I went out on a very shaky limb and started weekly entries to Self Portrait Challenge, I was never seen in photos if there was any way I could help it. I hated to see myself in photos and I mean that astonished, sickened, disassociated kind of hate. I just had no connection to myself that way....it was a puzzle that didn't fit. I could feel about myself one way, but when I actually saw myself, I felt totally different and not in a good way. It was weird, but I know that I'm not the only one who has felt that way and certainly not the only one who has spent more than my share of time hiding from the camera that I love so much.
So, now that I've been participating in SPC for the last 10 months, contributing every week and then finally building up the courage to just turn my camera around whenever I feel like it or hand it over to someone else and let them capture me the way they see me, I actually like it. I like not feeling invisible anymore, I like not having a wave of sickness wash over me just because I saw myself in a photo, and I like getting to know "me" better. This self portrait was taken just that way, I stood outside in natural light and turned the camera around, aimed at my desired focal point, and clicked the shutter. Such an easy exercise now.....but was admittedly painful to begin with. With each click of the shutter it gets easier and my view of myself, flaws and all, gets better - and that's a good thing!
So, now I'm asking you.....When is the last time you turned your camera around on your beautiful face and clicked the shutter? hmmmm? Are you ready to join me at Self Portrait Challenge or take the Invisible Photographer challenge? If you're not comfortable with putting your image out there, then just take this challenge at home. Upload those SP's on your own computer for your own eyes to see. I think you would be so happy with the way you'd begin to see yourself and learn about yourself. If you do, leave me a link....I would love to see you ;)
at 7:21 PM